Sunrise, Sunset

It’s my habit to watch the sunrise and the sunset every day.

I usually greet the morning in my rocking chair, looking out my east-facing picture window.  It never gets old to watch darkness chased away by relentless light rising over the tops of trees.

sunrise trees

Beautiful.

Every. Time.

Sunset is a little trickier.

I don’t have a clear view of the west from inside my house and the western edge of my property is peppered with tall trees so I usually only see the beginning of the end of every day.  But one of my favorite things to do is watch the golden glow of lingering light touch the tops of the highest pines and then slip away as the sun sinks below the horizon.

Another day has come and gone.

time-travelAnd the days become weeks that become months that become years.

Sometimes the days are long. 

But the years are short.

Some days bring news I don’t want to hear.  Some bring shouts of rejoicing. Either way I’m not the keeper of my days.  The sun neither rises nor sets at my bidding.

But I have choices in the daylight hours.  I can work while the sun is shining or I can worry that it might set soon.

I can take advantage of the light or I can wring my hands anticipating the darkness.

I am not naive. 

I wish I were. 

I wish I didn’t know by experience how much a heart can long for days gone by, days wasted, days that could have held more love and laughter but were overshadowed by worry or hurry or just indifference.

think-you-have-time

So I watch the sunrise to remind me that TODAY is a gift.  And I watch the sunset to remind me that the gift of today is gone forever.

What have I done with it?  Who have I loved?  Where have I placed my energy and purpose and hope?  

Every day is a once in a lifetime opportunity.  

I never want to forget that.  

 

Sunrise, sunset, Sunrise, sunset
Swiftly flow the days
Seedlings turn overnight to sunflowers
Blossoming even as we gaze
Sunrise, sunset, Sunrise, sunset
Swiftly fly the years
One season following another
Laden with happiness and tears

~Sheldon Harnick

Author: Melanie

I am a shepherd, wife and mother of four amazing children, three that walk the earth with me and one who lives with Jesus. This is a record of my grief journey and a look into the life I didn't choose. If you are interested in joining a community of bereaved parents leaning on the promises of God in Christ, please like the public Facebook page, "Heartache and Hope: Life After Losing a Child" and join the conversation.

6 thoughts on “Sunrise, Sunset”

  1. Oh, how the sunsrise and sunsets have always been a part of our lives in our family-a time of praise and thanksgiving- for what will be and what has been. A happy, fun time with our boys! Then the sunrise and it’s setting took on a whole new meaning for me. The morning after my son died, the windows in my bedroom were not covered. When the sun came shining in with all its glory, I opened my eyes and wanted to scream in agony. How dare the sun shine; my world was pitch black dark. How dare it shine and attempt to warm my heart! It was such a heartbreaking moment to realize that life goes on even though I felt like my world had stopped. Looking back, I realize that I needed the sun to rise, and I to be reminded that God is still in control, He is on His throne, and He is good. The sunrise is still a little difficult for me as I am reminded that I have to live another day without my son, but I do enjoy its beauty and warmth as I still praise God. And when the day is over, I am so thankful to watch the sun set in the sky knowing that I am one day closer to seeing my God and to holding my son, never again having to part.
    Melanie, Thank you for your posts. I read them every day. You are a blessing to my heart. May God continue to strengthen you as you encourage others on this painful journey to keep walking on this path that none of us chose.

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  2. Melanie, you always speak to my soul. I love the sunrise and sunset, as it reminds me of God’s promises and love for me. The morning after my son died, I walked down my street with coffee in hand as the son was rising. The sun casting it shadow thru the pine trees called to me. My soul was overwhelmed with the presence of God and his abundant love. One of the many sweet whispers I have received. One day I hope to meet and give you a big hug so you know how much your words encourage me and remind me that I am not alone with this constant struggle. After seven years, I have settled in a true place of trust in my God. It is still a daily struggle, but the promises and peace flow more quickly. Ann Hebert

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  3. I’m catching up on your posts. The day you posted this was the 1 yr anniversary of my Malcolm’s homegoing. One of the things he often photographed, watched, enjoyed were the sunrises and/or sunsets as he went to or from work.

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  4. The days seem to fly by and fade into each other. Grief over hangs too many moments. On January 21St it will be one year since my boy passed away. My heart is broken and my brain is reliving that week we spent by his side in the hospital with hope and prayers. Knowing God could change it all if that was His plan. He didn’t.
    Finding joy in each day is difficult. I need constant reminders that this is the day the Lord has made rejoice and be glad in it. But sometimes the heaviness of my heart weighs me down.
    Thank you Melanie, love Ann

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    1. I often have to remind myself several times a day to breathe, remember and lean into the promises of God. I pray that as you come up on this awful anniversary God gives you abundant grace and mercy. ❤

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