“I am the Alpha and the Omega, the First and the Last, the Beginning and the End [the Eternal One].” Revelation 22:13 AMP
Jesus, the eternal Son of the eternal Father, bookends all history.
Even though there are things that surprise me, there is nothing that surprises Him.
When my son died, I wrote this to be included in the bulletin at his funeral:
“Dominic’s death was an accident from our perspective, but God knew from the moment He gave Dominic to us, that this would happen. He was not surprised and He was and is in control. Jesus was with my precious child when he took his first breath and when he took his last. I don’t understand but I will trust.”
I still don’t understand, and I hurt, but Jesus is eternal, ever present and ever faithful–and I will trust.
“Lord, I am so caught up in the here and now that I often lose sight of eternity. Forgive me. When things surprise me, help me rest in You–the Beginning and the End–to trust You–the Alpha and Omega. Give me the grace to face each day with the settled assurance that whatever it may bring, You hold it in Your hand.”
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thelifeididntchoose 
Melanie You are an inspiration. I have been devastated and very angry since my son was killed in a car accident 5 mos ago. I dont know how to overcome the anger. I miss my son so hard. I feel betrayed by life. Did you ever have the same feelings or thoughts?
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I absolutely did have those feelings. They tended to come and go-most often (I am ashamed to admit) when I heard of some other person committing a terrible act against others. I’d think, “Why is he still living and allowed to harm other people when my kind, courageous and lovely son is dead?”
But then I would rein in my thoughts and remind my heart that I am not God. I don’t see the beginning from the end. And I would remind myself that sin has marred His perfect creation and humans have free will that often deviates from His perfect plan.
I eventually let go of the “why” (most days) and learned to live in the mysterious space between what I can know here on earth and God’s omniscience and absolutely faithful love. I trust that when I get to Heaven I will either have the answer or the answer won’t matter anymore.
Holding onto and insisting I understand was what fed my anger. When I let it go, I found the anger ebbed away.
Praying that the Lord wraps His loving arms around you and gives you grace and strength to hold onto hope. ❤
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Thank you for your insight and perspective. This most worst tragedy can make us bitter. Your lens help to try to steer away from that life.
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