Honestly I have no idea why I don’t climb my stairs, lay down in bed and pull the covers over my head.
Well, really I DO know why: it’s the enabling grace of Christ Jesus in my life
But my flesh still wants to give up and give in.
Because there is NO LIMIT to the amount of pain a heart may have to bear on this earthly journey.
I feel awfully guilty sometimes for being overwhelmed by my circumstances when I hear of much more challenging situations that other hearts face.
I have to remind myself that comparison is unhealthy regardless of whether I’m stacking up pain or pleasure, blessings or trials.
Truth is, sometimes life just sucks.
I know that’s an unpopular assertion among church folks.
But it’s a fact.
God shows up and He showers grace. And His grace sustains me. Still, I feel ALL the pain.
Faith is not anesthesia.
I’ll be honest-I’ve had a summer full of hard things. I’ve greeted more than one sunrise with tears. I’ve ended more than one day worn out, worn down and utterly bereft of hope that tomorrow will be any better.
When I’m finally able to enter the bliss of dreamless sleep I manage a bit of escape until the day’s dawn drags my heart back to reality.
Of course the background noise of grief and loss never changes but goodness gracious how I’d love 24 uninterrupted hours of everything going right!
So far that hasn’t happened,
I’m getting kind of used to it.
I’ll never forget the trouble, the utter lostness,
the taste of ashes, the poison I’ve swallowed.
I remember it all—oh, how well I remember—
the feeling of hitting the bottom.
But there’s one other thing I remember,
and remembering, I keep a grip on hope:
God’s loyal love couldn’t have run out,
his merciful love couldn’t have dried up.
They’re created new every morning.
How great your faithfulness!
I’m sticking with God (I say it over and over).
He’s all I’ve got left.
Lamentations 3:19-24 MSG