These past few weeks have been challenging.
A dozen unrelated things have added up to a load I struggle to carry.
I have absolutely NO reserves.
No extra emotional or physical resources that can help me bounce back when things get tough.
Every day I tread a razor’s edge instead of the broad path I used to walk.
It takes so much effort just to keep from falling off that I have a hard time looking ahead and am regularly blindsided by things I might have avoided, or handled better or made plans to endure.
So I take the hits full force–defenses down.
I’ve learned to hide it. Most of the time.
I’ve learned to lower my eyes, bite my tongue or walk away to catch my breath.
I’ve nearly mastered the art of holding in the tears.
You think I’m strong.
But I’m not.
You will hardly ever know when my heart is hurting.
But it is.