No Remedy

Our family has a reputation:  If it’s broke, sick or something just plain hard to do–call us.

We are not miracle workers but we are hard workers.  We can’t fix everything, but we will try to do something.  

But there’s one thing we can’t fix.

One thing none of our skills can shape into a victory in the shadow of defeat.  One thing that will not give in to elbow grease or commitment to persevere.

We can’t fix Dominic’s being gone.  

We can’t make it better.

We can’t undo the deep hole his absence has carved in our hearts and our lives.  

And that is very, very hard to live with.  

 

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Author: Melanie

I am a shepherd, wife and mother of four amazing children, three that walk the earth with me and one who lives with Jesus. This is a record of my grief journey and a look into the life I didn't choose. If you are interested in joining a community of bereaved parents leaning on the promises of God in Christ, please like the public Facebook page, "Heartache and Hope: Life After Losing a Child" and join the conversation.

6 thoughts on “No Remedy”

  3. Once again, your experience resonates with my own – you articulate the gist of it so precisely. We are thankful to be a get ‘er done kind of family, too. Once, we had to get to a doctor appointment but we were snowed in. We used two sheets of plywood to get out – drive onto one, get out of the car & put the next one in front of the car, and so on – for a quarter of a mile. Another time we shoveled the whole quarter mile by hand – the six of us – together. On various occasions one or more of us has saved a sow having difficulty having her piglets; we have installed insulation & siding outside with a below zero wind chill; we have rescued people from a freezing river. If it’s no fun, hard, or dirty, give us a call & we’ll see what we can do. But no matter how high we roll up our sleeves, we cannot get Hans back. We always assumed there was nothing that couldn’t be accomplished without a little hard work. We were wrong.

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    1. Kim, this sounds so much like my family! Except our adventures didn’t include sub-zero temps and snow. Now, not only can we not “fix” this, we are one man short. We were always a work team of six. It’s hard.

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      1. One man short. That’s how it always feels. Add to that the fact that Hans was our personal mechanic and fix-it man…well, we are having to learn some new skills while also remembering, “This is what Hans used to do for us.” We always knew he was a big help around here, but I just didn’t realize the extent to which we depended on him for his practical help as well as his ability to lighten our load by making us laugh. His energy level gave our family momentum which has been challenging to recover. I am hoping to write some time in the future about how the Lord moved Hans to provide for us and prepare us, in practical ways, for his departure. It was something he was very concerned about. The Lord has been faithful since Hans left us, as always. With His help, this, too, we can do.

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