Oh, how easy it would be to become bitter!
If I’m honest, part of me just wants to tell the world to “Get lost!”.
But the wiser part of me knows that’s neither a helpful nor healthy response to even this most awful burden of child loss.
Lament is how we bring our sorrow to God. Without lament, we won’t know how to process pain. Silence, bitterness, and even anger can dominate our spiritual lives instead.
~Mark Vroegop – Dark Clouds Deep Mercy
Because my bitter spirit wouldn’t stop with me. It would spread like kudzu on an Alabama roadside.

The writer of Hebrews warns against this very thing:
Be careful that none of you fails to respond to the grace which God gives, for if he does there can very easily spring up in him a bitter spirit which is not only bad in itself but can also poison the lives of many others.
Hebrews 12:15 PHILLIPS
There is sufficient grace for even this.
But I can refuse it.
It’s a choice every single day.
Do I embrace the grace God freely offers or do I turn my back and embrace bitterness? Do I lean in to every promise of God in Christ or do I listen to the enemy of my soul who whispers, “Did God REALLY say….?”

Bitterness never ends with one person. It spreads. It grows.
It ruins lives and relationships and generations.
We all know families where it has taken root. We all know old folks whose faces are frozen in frowns and who rarely speak except to pass along their spiteful comments.
I may not get many things right. I’m pretty sure I get quite a few things wrong.
But I don’t want to mess this one up.
Bitterness is a terrible legacy.
I refuse to pass it on.

I am living this battle daily in the loss of my 2nd spouse (only 10 mths into our marriage). “Did God really” give me happiness again, only to yank it right out of my hands?! Thank you for expressing it as if it’s just a natural reaction and as if it can be overcome. I’ve never met you, but I love you. Thank you, Melanie.
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“It’s a choice every single day…” and every day is new and offers enough grace. Melanie, to write this the day after 5 years, thank you for getting up and encouraging me.💛💙
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So true. Thanks Melanie.
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I try daily to be better over bitter. Once again you write my heart heart. Hugs to you Melanie. ❤️❤️
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I have had a fear of becoming bitter after our son passed away unexpectedly and suddenly. It is so tempting to sit and stew in my pain. I don’t want to do that, though I sometimes do. Thank you for the boost of encouragement to not let this insidious weed creep into my heart.
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