In the daylight
In the dark
In my dreams
Things creep in at the corner of my vision
Or sounds slip in unnoticed
Until my brain puts them together and screams, “Oh no!”.
It’s nothing worth getting excited about, nothing worth the surge of adrenaline that raises my heart rate, brings whatever I ate last back to my throat and sets my mind racing.
But the damage is done.
Now I’m fully engaged in a losing game of questions with no answers.
If I was asleep, I won’t be now.
If I wasn’t, I won’t be any time soon.
And if I was trying to get things done, I’m done for the day.
Anything, anytime, anywhere.
The taste of panic fills my mouth and I swallow it down.