I thought I had at least a passing understanding of what grief is, what it feels like, how it impacts a heart before my son died.
But I was wrong.
Until you live with it day in and day out for weeks, months, years you really just. don’t. know.
There are so many feelings wrapped up in what we call grief. So many surprises along this path.
Who knew that the same heart that would do nearly ANYTHING to spare another parent the awful burden of child loss could also be wildly jealous of that same parent’s intact family?
Read the rest here: Jealousy-Reaching For What I Can’t Have
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thelifeididntchoose 
Thank you so much for writing this. It has been almost 12 years since I lost my son Will to brain cancer, but I have struggled with this as well… being happy for the weddings and new grandchildren of my friends…or as you say, even simply pictures of their family gatherings with all of their children…but deep down being jealous as well. Like you, I don’t find jealousy to be a productive feeling, but sometimes I just can’t help it. Thank you for your continued inspiration.
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