Why I Still Speak About My Son


I know it makes some people uncomfortable when I speak of Dominic.

They aren’t sure whether to join in or ignore my comment and hope I change the subject.

I get it-they are wondering whether my continued interest in my missing child is a sign of mental illness (she’s “stuck” in grief) or a delusion or wishful thinking.  They have no frame of reference other than an elderly relative whose passing into eternity was a more orderly and expected event.

But out of order death is wrenching and traumatic and not the way things are supposed to be.  A parent doesn’t stop thinking about or talking about or loving his or her child simply because they have been robbed of their physical presence.

I speak of my son because he is STILL MY SON.






Author: Melanie

I am a shepherd, wife and mother of four amazing children, three that walk the earth with me and one who lives with Jesus. This is a record of my grief journey and a look into the life I didn't choose. If you are interested in joining a community of bereaved parents leaning on the promises of God in Christ, please like the public Facebook page, "Heartache and Hope: Life After Losing a Child" and join the conversation.

9 thoughts on “Why I Still Speak About My Son”

  1. I completely agree. Funny, I just read a post from a young mother who does not want to discuss her heavenly daughter with new co-workers, yet, and I get it. It’s personal for us all. But I must speak of my son in my regular conversations. Prayers for you, prayers for us all.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I agree with you. I constantly talk about Karly. I work with people that never had the chance to meet my girl, yet if you ask them, they would tell you they feel as if they knew her. She is part of my daily conversation. This is such a difficult journey. I do not know how people survive it without God. Much love to you 💖

      Liked by 1 person

      1. May you feel the Father’s loving arms around you today and may He overwhelm your heart with His grace and mercy. Thank you for joining the conversation and encouraging others. ❤


    2. I think some people do want to keep their child loss journey separate from their professional life. Sometimes it can be an escape to have a space where you aren’t known as the “bereaved parent”. Like you, I am compelled to speak of my son wherever I am and whoever I’m with. May the Lord give you what you need for every day. ❤


  2. I so dislike that look I see in people’s face when I speak of our son. It is something worse than pity and discomfort. I truly feel I am being evaluated for mental illness or being graded on a test or something. I guess this is just part of The Experience. Thank you for every time you make me feel I am not alone.

    Liked by 1 person

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