Bereaved Parents Month

Before Dominic ran ahead to heaven I knew only a handful of bereaved parents, all of whom I met after their bereavement.

I had never walked with anyone through this Valley.

Now I am friends with dozens of them and there are hundreds more I “know” online through private groups and blogs.

Until this was MY life, I would have dismissed “Bereaved Parents Month” as another random and narrowly applicable declaration by some group trying to muster support for their own agenda.

I’m ashamed to say that, but it’s true.  

Like most folks,  I assumed my life would follow the typical trajectory of marriage, children, their marriages and grandchildren in an unbroken chain of generations-the younger burying the older.

That’s how it is supposed to be. 

But that isn’t how it has turned out for me and so, so many others.  

Now, “Bereaved Parents Month” is near and dear to my heart.  I understand that we need to raise awareness of the ongoing challenges parents face in the wake of child loss.

I see clearly that those outside the child loss community really have no clue.  

How could they?

So my challenge to readers for the remainder of this month is twofold:  

  • If you are a bereaved parent, please use this time to share articles, blog posts and personal experiences on your social media platforms.  One of the easiest ways to raise awareness and to educate the public is simply to make the topic unavoidable. (That’s what book tours and movie trailers and press releases do.)  Be honest.  Be bold.  Be unapologetic for the fact that you continue to miss your child, that you continue to love your child and that the life you have NOW is very different than the life you had before loss.
  • If you are the friend or family member of a bereaved parent, please read what we post-even if your first response is “Oh, no!  Not again!”  However tired you are of hearing about our loss and ongoing struggle cannot compare to the exhaustion of living it.  Honor our child and us by listening.

Compassionate response is only possible when we begin to understand what another heart is facing.  

This month is an opportunity to do that.  

Let’s make the most of it.

juliy bereaved parents month

Author: Melanie

I am a shepherd, wife and mother of four amazing children, three that walk the earth with me and one who lives with Jesus. This is a record of my grief journey and a look into the life I didn't choose. If you are interested in joining a community of bereaved parents leaning on the promises of God in Christ, please like the public Facebook page, "Heartache and Hope: Life After Losing a Child" and join the conversation.

12 thoughts on “Bereaved Parents Month”

  1. I am a parent who has lost my child also. The endless pain and emptiness is numbing. The whys, what if. The longing to hold your child, kiss them. So many lost dreams. The feeling of being lost. And also trying to find eho the new you is. I have found with my grief there is no avoiding it, no way to go around it…..you have to face it, except it and ride the neverending wave of pain. But its been 2 years and l am here. Xx

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  2. I have written a book ‘ Empty arms, broken heart, my journey through grief. An Islamic and scientific perspective on miscarriage’. My aim for writing this book is to recognise bereaved parents and the impact their loss has on them. The book has been written to bring about awareness of bereavement.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Well, yes-all of us are living it if we have buried a child. But this is an opportunity to let others know a bit about our journey and the kind of ongoing support we need to be able to make it through. ❤

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  3. I love your honesty!
    I’ve only been on this journey for 25 days, and I keep coming back to your articles because it’s all “real” with no “fluff”

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’m so sorry you have joined this “club”. I’m sorry for your pain and loss. It helps my heart to hear that my words may speak courage to another grieving mama. May the Lord wrap His loving arms around you and may He shower your heart with His grace and mercy. ❤

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  4. I have not lost a child. I am for some reason drawn to your blog. It has challenged me to be more aware of those around me who are hurting (and there are a lot more than I had thought). I am glad you are able to share your thoughts. Because I am listening.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. How absolutely beautiful of you, to want to try to understand those who have survived this nightmare. Many want us to forget and ‘get on with our lives’.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Thank you for the challenge to bring awareness. I often share articles on grief, suffering, caregiving, etc. Many fb friends have lost children, spouses, parents, friends. They, or loved ones, deal with issues like cancer, alzheimers, fractured families, depression, addictions, disabilities. I rarely share the personal pain of child loss anymore. So many are hurting, I feel like a voice lost in a crowd. I want to help and encourage them through their valleys, thus the articles, but I now seem to wear a label of “bereaved parent” that no one can see past, and few want to affiliate with.
    This is also sarcoma awareness month–double awareness for us this month. My son fought Ewings Sarcoma, one of the over 50 types of sarcoma cancer which most people have never heard of. We hadn’t, until his diagnosis. 15% of children’s cancers are sarcoma’s, 1% of adult cancer are a type of sarcoma. We also wear the label “cancer parent”, which no one can see past and few want to affiliate with. I don’t post much about cancer anymore either. Most of my contacts from the cancer world are bereaved parents also.
    I’m thankful for the few who have walked beside us, and for the opportunity to encourage them in their own struggles.
    I will be bold today, and remind others of the pain of child loss, and the challenges of a rare, aggressive cancer.

    Liked by 2 people

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