We try to separate the two.
We want to draw a line that marks when one ended and the other began.
But it’s impossible. Because grief and love are of one piece.
Grief isn’t what comes AFTER love, grief IS love.
Grief is love with no place to go.
It’s what a heart is left with when the person upon which that love would be lavished is no longer available to receive what is offered.
We celebrate lifetime love. We make much over marriages that survive the years. We applaud the lost pet that pads his way home in spite of miles and misery to lay at the feet of his master.
Yet we want grievers to give up their sadness and bottle their tears because it makes US uncomfortable. It reminds us that next week WE could be the ones left with unspent love in our hearts.
But grief can never be small where love is large.