One of the challenges in this journey as it lengthens into years is that it is just so DAILY.
Milestone dates and holidays aside, most of the time I’m just a woman trying to make it through 24 hours at a time. I’m just doing all the things life requires without letting grief overwhelm me.
I’ve gotten pretty good at it too.
Sorrow is no longer all I feel and my son’s absence is no longer all I see.
I laugh as well as cry. I look forward to my living children joining me around the table. I anticipate changing seasons and plan holiday meals again.
But much of my time is spent plodding faithfully forward to a future I cannot see and a reunion I long for.
Maybe it’s because I’m only at four years but I haven’t yet recovered a sense of excitement about the future no matter what wonderful event might be waiting on the calendar.
I cannot recapture joyful anticipation.
The best I can do is not be afraid of what might be around the corner.
And keep on keeping on.
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thelifeididntchoose 
“I cannot recapture joyful anticipation.”
So true! Thank you, Melanie. This describes my heavy heart as I walk my life.
Thank you💛💙
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This really spoke to me today. I live day by day – only 3 years after I said goodbye to my adult son after a long battle with cancer and my sister after only one year apart. The future I look forward to is to be reunited with them – this world does not hold my future, but I also enjoy every day I can spend with my other children and am torn between heaven and wanting to watch my grandchildren grow up. It is an everyday struggle. Thank you for all your words of truth. Karen
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Thank you Melanie for your blog. You express so many of my feelings & pain. I keep on but there’s not much joy. Grief & saddeness is a constant companion. My Laura went home to meet Jesus last April 13th. So a year is breathing down my neck. My birthday is 4 days later. All your blogs have helped me so much to understand this difficult journey. It’s a lonely one & life goes on. God bless you for sharing with me!!!
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I am so very sorry for your pain and your loss. You are fresh on this journey! At a year and beyond I was still often spending an entire day in tears or very close to them. Praying that the Lord will overwhelm your wounded heart with His love, grace and mercy and that He will meet you where you are, with provision for each day. It seems like a heart won’t make it, but leaning in and holding on, it will. ❤
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Thankyou Melanie for your encouraging words. Easter is three days away & I know my Redemer lives & she’s spending her 2 nd Easter with her Savior . I take real comfort in that . Just miss her everyday!!!! You’ve helped me so much in this difficult journey.
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