I know I’m not the only one who carries a calendar in my head that threatens to explode like a ticking timebomb. Days that mean nothing to anyone else loom large as they approach.
The date of his death.
The date of his funeral.
His birthday.
My birthday.
The day he should have graduated from law school.
On and on and on.
How can I survive these oppressive reminders of what I thought my life would look like? How can I grab hold of something, anything that will keep my heart and mind from falling down the rabbit hole of grief into a topsy-turvy land where nothing makes sense and it’s full of unfriendly creatures that threaten to gobble me whole?
Read the rest here: Surviving Grief Anniversaries
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thelifeididntchoose 
I understand. I lost my dear daughter who was 29 two years ago. A wife and mother of 3 girls (ages 4 months, 2 and 4 years old) died unexpectedly of heart disease. I am now helping raise her children.
I’m so glad I recently found your blog! You are so good at sharing thoughts and I identify with you so much!!!
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I’m so sorry for your pain and loss. Sudden death is especially hard on a heart. I’m thankful the blog helps a little.
What a precious privilege to have her little ones surrounding you. I pray they bring you much joy on this broken road.
May the Lord greet you every morning with grace and strength for that day’s challenges and may you hear His singing courage over your heart. ❤
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My son Garrett was a giver. In his short life of 35 years he gave generously of his time and talents to whomever needed it. His last gift was as an organ donor. We recently found out that all of the organ recipients are doing well and their lives have been changed because of his last gift. Now I have those anniversaries to endure too. Every day he is gone is another day for an organ recipient and their families. Even knowing this my shattered heart still aches. Every day is an anniversary for me.
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