I first shared this four years ago when I was still in the early days of mourning Dominic. Our family was facing the third set of holidays with an empty chair at the table.
Life since then has been full of additional challenges and loss.
I still rebel sometimes at the road I’m asked to walk.
But I am more convinced than ever that when I yield my life and heart to the Master Potter, He will mold me and make me into the likeness of Jesus.
And that’s really who I want to be-even if it hurts.
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I can’t claim to be satisfied with this life I’m living.
I do not like this path I am forced to walk, this darkness that hides the light, this pain that burrows deep in my bones.
But I can say I’m learning not to fight it.
Sometimes I still pitch a fit.
Read the rest here: Yielded and Still
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thelifeididntchoose 
“I can’t claim to be satisfied with this life I’m living.
I do not like this path I am forced to walk, this darkness that hides the light, this pain that burrows deep in my bones.
But I can say I’m learning not to fight it.
Sometimes I still pitch a fit. ”
But to have just a mustard seed of faith… to hold on, most days, to the truth that God is at work. To remember that His ways are not our ways, His thoughts are not our thoughts. To know that He KNOWS the depth of our grief, and He understands our questioning. He will not abandon us in the ugly hard. We are not alone.
Thank you for your honesty, and for reminding us we aren’t alone. You encourage my heart every day to go on.
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