Do They Have Birthdays in Heaven?

Today would have been Dominic’s twenty-sixth birthday.

He should have been a little over a year out of law school and one year into a career.

Instead, he’s not here.  And he will never be HERE again.

I’m getting pretty good at shifting my focus from the giant hole that is where Dominic is supposed to be to the fullness of the life that still surrounds me.  Not today.

Today the absence of his presence is especially keen.






I miss him.

I miss his smile.


I miss his harsh logic that would slice through a conversation like a knife. I miss his noisy descent down the stairs-always snapping his fingers to a rhythm in his head.

I miss his sense of humor.


I miss his fearlessness.


I miss his hugs.


I miss how even though he claimed to “hate” kids, he melted every time one crawled into his lap.


I miss how he used to launch himself, back first, on my bed to announce he was there to talk for a bit.

I miss how he found special tools to help me in the kitchen when my arthritis kept me from being able to do something I loved.

I miss how he could combine tough talk and smooth BS into cajoling a complaint department to not only fix the problem but throw in a gift card as well “to keep his business”.

I miss being able to call him with my stupid tech questions and have him walk me slowly through the solution (even though I know it frustrated him).

I miss his texts, his calls, his FB messages. I miss his tweets.



I know I’ll see him again someday and that we will never have to say good-bye again.

But until then,  I really, really miss him.  

and so it was that she having waited long


Author: Melanie

I am a shepherd, wife and mother of four amazing children, three that walk the earth with me and one who lives with Jesus. This is a record of my grief journey and a look into the life I didn't choose. If you are interested in joining a community of bereaved parents leaning on the promises of God in Christ, please like the public Facebook page, "Heartache and Hope: Life After Losing a Child" and join the conversation.

18 thoughts on “Do They Have Birthdays in Heaven?”

  1. My Melanie turned 29 this month (may 9). This month has been a challenge. Last month (april) was her death date. That was incredibly hard to get thru also.
    It’s not just the one date… it’s the entire month. I miss everything about my daughter n I cant believe I have to live out my days without seeing, hearing, being with. Dying may be hard but when i take my last breath it will be the end of my heavy weight (grief) and on to the business of pure bliss.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. My son Christopher passed away last year, one day after his 30th birthday. I know I will never be able to separate the two events and it just makes it doubly hard on both days. Perhaps as the years pass, it won’t be quite as raw as this first year. My heart goes out to all the mothers missing their children, on their birthdays and every day

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Hugs to you, Melanie, on this, the birthday of your precious son. It’s so bittersweet, I have found. I am so thankful that Jason was born into our family, I am so thankful that we have so many wonderful memories, I am so thankful that we will see him again. But, like you, there are days when I just really, really miss him.


  4. I feel your pain, I pray God helps you thru each and every day.
    My David’s birthday was May 23 and I tried to celebrate his life too. But at the end of the day it comes back to we miss them so much and the life they had to live.
    May God Bless you and your ministry. You are my daily read. Your words come to life for me. I’m so sorry you lost your precious son but I’m so thankful you are able to use your gift to help so many and I hope as well as yourself.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Charlene, thank you for the kind words and the love and prayers. I’m thankful my writing is helpful to you. I try to be honest and share both what I feel and what I think I’m hearing from God in this valley. May the Lord also strengthen you every day and may grace and mercy be your close companions on this journey we didn’t want to take.


  5. Happy birthday Dominic. My Jessica 25th birthday was on the 7th. Thank you so very much for your blog each one said exactly what I feel on my journey. My heart really hurts for you. We are anither year cliser ti seeing them.I think I miss her more each day.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. The birthday of our child who has finished the journey and returned to a “place” we will one day be, if we follow Jesus and live with LOVE, is always to be celebrated. Each life is precious. Each death has its reason, its purpose, although we cannot fully comprehend that in our flesh. Remembering this precious gift given to you today, and keeping you in prayer, your friend: Jill

    Liked by 1 person

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