Four years ago today I shared my first post in this space.
It was a timid foray into the wider world just a year and a half after Dominic ran ahead to Heaven.
I was truly frightened that once I began sharing my intimate thoughts, good (and not-so-good) experiences and things I was learning in this Valley of the Shadow of Death I would either (1) find out no one really cared and/or (2) offend friends and family.
But what motivated me to overcome that fear was a sense that for all the information out there on grief in general, I couldn’t find nearly enough first-person experience written in bite-sized chunks on child loss in particular.
After Dom ran ahead, it was difficult for me to sit down and read a whole book. I needed bits I could read on a single computer screen.
I also needed someone to be upfront and honest about what it meant to continue to cling to faith even when it was hard and even when it meant acknowledging doubts and living with unanswered questions.
It’s difficult to believe now with the plethora of popular books (both secular and religious) on “open broken” but four and five years ago, there weren’t many around.
So I decided I’d just say what I had to say and let it fall on the ears that might need to hear it regardless of who didn’t like it or chose to ignore it.
And here we are four years later.
I don’t know how long I’ll keep writing-probably as long as I feel like I have something to say, people are listening and my fingers can still tap-tap-tap the keyboard.
For now, writing is what I do.
Even when life interrupts almost everything else I will find a few moments to jot down thoughts and hit “publish”. I know some posts are much thinner than others-maybe just a meme or two and an encouraging word. But I want to show up in case THIS morning someone’s having an especially rotten one.
I want you to know that there IS life after child loss.
A very different life.
A harder life.
A life you didn’t want and wouldn’t ever choose, but life nonetheless.
And I appreciate every. single. heart. who joins me here and cheers me (and others!) along.
6 thoughts on “Thank You For Four Years of Faithful Listening!”
Melanie, as I approach the second anniversary of my initiation into this horrible ‘club’, I want you to know that you have been a voice in the wilderness for me since the beginning. Your compassion is your calling card and it has brought me tremendous hope and a sense of community. Thank you and here’s to four more years!! 🙂
Melanie you do so much to chivvy yourself and us along on this hard road. I find you truly amazing…thank you for the time and effort you make.
Love from across the ocean xxx
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Thank you from the bottom of my broken heart. It’s amazing how close your words line up with what I’m feeling.
Our Dominic went to be with the Lord April 28th, 2019. He leaves behind a twin brother. They are 17 years old. Your words are so much comfort to me. Thank you for putting scripture in your writings.
Thank you for your open and honest reflections and for letting us know that we are not alone as we doubt and mourn and pray and wonder why we have to suffer this loss.
You are a light. I look forward to your posts every day, as I know others in my community do. Thank you. My prayers for you and your family continue.