I was reminded yet again when I spent time with other bereaved parents over the past couple of weeks at two different events how very, very, VERY helpful it has been to do just that.
In the earliest days after Dominic ran ahead, a couple of local moms whose children were also in Heaven came to see me. How I hung on every word! How I longed for a glimmer of hope that I, too, could somehow survive this devastation!
It was much later that I discovered online support groups. And it opened a whole new world of experience, understanding and freedom to ask the questions that had been burning in my heart: “Is what I’m feeling normal?” “Did you still cry every day after months?” “Why can’t I remember anything anymore?”
Almost ten years ago I started writing here and found another level of compassion and companionship when y’all joined me and practically shouted, “Keep sharing!”.
At every turn I have been amazed that so many whose hearts are broken choose to reach out when I know from bitter experience it would be oh, so easy to withdraw.Thank you, thank you, thank you, my precious wounded healers.
❤ Melanie
There have been many well-meaning but woefully uninformed people who offered advice. Some of it was helpful but most of it was predicated on misinformation and lack of real-life experience.
The MOST helpful advice has come from fellow bereaved parents.
They share their hearts and their hopes, their failures and their victories, their fears and their faith. They don’t have to-they could simply focus on their own pain and refuse to offer aid.
Read the rest here: Thankful for Support
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thelifeididntchoose 
I agree wholeheartedly that getting connected to the moms that were a few paths ahead of me on this journey of bereaved moms,was a life saver.
I joined the support group The Compassionate Friends, loss of a special needs child sub chapter, to obtain the added grace of my particular loss, as our children required us to be caregivers throughout their lives.
My child was 42 years 7 months with me, within that timeframe, i don’t think we spent much time apart.
When she went to her eternal home, i was unable to function as I figuratively was missing a limb.
This year marked 9 mothers days without her, and it was the best one of this holiday without her so far.
Since I began honoring Mother’s day the Sunday before as a bereaved mom, I allow that day to bring up, and let me experience all emotions that may visit and give these the attention they insist on getting.
Then at night, I bid it a farewell and that, the most difficult grief trigger day of all other days, ends for me.
I do my best, with God’s help, not to allow my sorrow to carry on or follow me to the next Sunday.
Choosing to distance my heart from the established day to celebrate Mother’s day, has helped me to purposefully be present to celebrate all other mothers and their little or big children with a much more open and joyful heart.
My blessings and support to my tribal warrior momsas we are among the bravest mothers walking this journey home.
Isabel, Christina’s mom
🩷
“I believe in pink. I believe that laughing is the best calorie burner. I believe in kissing, kissing a lot. I believe in being strong when everything seems to be going wrong. I believe that happy girls are the prettiest girls. I believe that tomorrow is another day and I believe in miracles.” ― Audrey Hepburn http://www.goodreads.com/author/show/692403.Audrey_Hepburn
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