My first post in this space was September 16, 2015. A lot has happened since then.
My twenty-three year old son, Dominic, ran ahead to Heaven in a single vehicle motorcycle accident April 12, 2014. It shattered my world and my worldview. Longing for a voice who would tell the WHOLE, unedited story of loss and faith, I felt compelled to begin sharing my own journey. I committed then to being as transparent as possible and I think I’ve been faithful to that promise.
The intervening years have had many challenges. More than four thousand posts tell the tale.
If you’ve been here for the past year or so, you know my father had a devastating stroke at almost ninety years old LAST September. In addition to changing my availability for ministry (as I was caring for him), it means that half my time is spent where there is little internet service and almost no cell phone service so writing and posting are really difficult and require a great deal of forethought and planning.
Then in January, my precious granddaughter, Holly, went to Jesus after a brief two weeks here on earth. It has been a hard journey for all of us but especially for my son and his wife and family.
I have tried, tried, tried to send out hope and light across the Internet and around the world even when my own heart was hanging on by a thread.
Over the years I’ve taken a few short breaks and, without really planning it, I took another one for most of the month of September.
I have Rheumatoid Arthritis and my hands and wrists have made typing difficult so my computer has sat unattended for some weeks while waiting for new medicine to provide relief. Things are just beginning to feel better, so here I am again.
This many years into the journey I have a different perspective than when I began. And I know there are many, other, more popular ways to share insights than what seems now an old-fashioned blog, but this is the format with which I am most familiar and comfortable so I intend to keep showing up.
Some of you are familiar with my ministry, Heartache and Hope (heartacheandhope.org), which I formed a couple years ago. I am praying that next year (2027) I will be able to do some retreats again, perhaps a monthly zoom meeting online and make more devotional and teaching materials available online. Stay tuned (as they used to say!) for updates.
If you’ve read this far, may I ask for your support and prayer?
- Please comment and let me know what challenges you are facing in your child loss journey.
- Tell me what posts have spoken to you and why.
- Allow me to pray for you by sharing your own prayer requests.
Thank you for every heart who has joined me here over the years.
May the Lord meet you where you are in ways that surprise and delight you and may you feel loved, held and comforted.
❤ Melanie
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Our journey into child loss began on March 30,2019. Our son Trevor died from an accidental drug overdose at 26. He would be turning 34 this December. As you know our lives have changed forever. It is the ordinary every day moments that can still bring me to my knees. Seven years is yesterday and forever. I have been reading your posts for seven years and it seems that the days I choose to read them they speak to me as if you were saying exactly what I am feeling at the moment. I understand the pull you have taking car of your father as I am also caring for my mother who is 95. I hope you continue to gain strength physically. I appreciate everything that you do for all bereaved families
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Your writing has meant so much to me, I couldn’t possibly pick one post or subject. You express thoughts and feelings I am not able to put into words myself. Your honesty about losing your child has helped me feel less alone in my grief.
I know that your faith is an important part of how you understand and cope with your loss. I don’t share those beliefs, but I deeply respect what they mean to you, and I hope it’s okay to say that the emotional truth and humanity in your writing reaches me nonetheless.
I am so thankful for you. Please know that your words matter, and that they have made a difference to me.I lost my son in 2021 and one of the hardest parts of grief for me lately is watching my other children grow older while Jack remains forever 21. Their birthdays and milestones are beautiful, but they also remind me of the life he should be living and the years he should be accumulating alongside them. I miss knowing who he would be becoming.
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I lost my 36 year old son, suddenly soon after your loss. Jacob died July 15, 2015 and I have followed you ever since. I appreciate the work you do and the many helpful insights.
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