116 Months…

I’ll be honest, after nine years I’m not counting months anymore.

But I did.

Just like when my sweet little brown haired baby came home from the hospital and I marked every exciting milestone as we marched toward his first birthday.

The months I counted after he left so suddenly weren’t happy celebrations, they were mournful reminders he was missing and would BE missing for as long as it took for me to join him.

Thankfully, the twelfth isn’t a stab in the heart like it once was.

I do still stop and allow myself to feel the deep ache of wanting a hug and a long talk.

Now, though, I can also take a moment to remember the beauty of Dom’s life not just the pain of his death.

2016: Twelve Things I Love to Remember

It rolls around every month-the twelfth-that glaring reminder that on this day “x” number of months ago, I woke to the news Dominic was never coming home again.

This month is 28.  Twenty-eight months-more than 28 moon cycles-over two years.

I don’t cry all day on this monthly reminder anymore-although I used to. And I have tried various ways to redeem it.

This month I decided to share twelve things I love to remember about Dominic. Maybe some things even his good friends didn’t know:

Read the rest here: Twelve Things I Love to Remember

2017: It’s Never Too Late to Be a Friend!

We’ve all been there-something traumatic or earth-shattering happens to someone we know and we mean to get in touch.  

I put “write a note” or “call” on my list and then don’t do it.

Days, weeks months pass by.  Now I feel awkward.

And the need to let her know I care is overshadowed by my sense of shame at not doing it sooner.

Read the rest here: It’s Never Too Late to be a Friend!

2019: The One I Run To

When I read the Psalms I hear human voices.

I hear real people living real lives facing real problems.

Life and death and celebration and devastation-all laid bare for the ages.

They give me courage to speak plainly to God.

They help me frame my own struggles in the context of who God is and not only what I feel.

Read the rest here: Scripture Journal Challenge: The One I Run To