Grief forces me to walk Relentlessly Forward even when I long to go back.
I can’t stop the clock or the sun or the days rolling by.
Those of us who are more than a couple months along in this journey (or any journey that involves tragedy and loss) know that it is ABSOLUTELY POSSIBLEto feel worse than in the first few days.
Read the rest here: Trust After Loss: Acknowledge Doubt and Ask Questions
I can’t tell you the number of times I’ve heard or read bereaved parents second-guessing themselves. They say or write: “I know you’re not supposed to ask ‘why?'”
Baloney! The Psalms are FILLED with “Why God?”
Questions are where the rubber meets the road in the Christian life.
Questions are where I learn to submit my heart to the lordship of a God Who loves me and Who has a perfect plan even when all I can see is pain.
Questions are the way I weed my garden of faith-they force me to choose between trust and doubt.
“There are those who say faith means you never doubt. Those who live by the creed, ‘Don’t ask questions!’
But I say faith is exactly what you cling to in the margins of doubt–when you have exhausted all the possibilities that exist in the physical, you-can-touch-it world and yet you KNOW there is MORE”
Read the rest of this post here:Debate and Faith
No one has dared to say it to my face, but they don’t have to. In the darkness, whispers abound and they taunt me: “Where’s God now?”
“What has this faith in Jesus done for you?”
And my first response is to add up the “good” things that have happened in my life and weigh them against the “bad”.
How do I balance scales that on one side include burying my child?
How many good things would have to be piled up to outweigh the heartbreak of losing my son?
But then my heart reminds me that this is the wrong equation. The underlying premise of this arithmetic is that I can give proper value to the things I’m adding up. Even more, that the scales I am using are correctly balanced, unbiased and trustworthy.
I want my relationship with God to be one I can comprehend. I want to be able to explain Who He is and what He is doing. I want to KNOW.
Adam and Eve KNEW-they walked in the cool of the Garden with the Lord God. And even that was not enough to keep them from doubting His goodness, His promise, His heart.
So is it any wonder that on my weakest days, in my most broken moments I doubt what God is doing as I walk this valley?
If my faith depended on me, there would be no hope. If my feelings were the measure of truth, there would be no way to gauge falsehood. If my future is in my hands, I am doomed.
But all is not lost–because from before the foundation of the world, God planned my redemption, He arranged my adoption and He keeps my faith and my future secure:
Praise be to God for giving us through Christ every possible spiritual benefit as citizens of Heaven! For consider what he has done—before the foundation of the world he chose us to become, in Christ, his holy and blameless children living within his constant care. He planned, in his purpose of love, that we should be adopted as his own children through Jesus Christ—that we might learn to praise that glorious generosity of his which has made us welcome in the everlasting love he bears towards the Son.
Ephesians 1:4-6 PHILLIPS
thelifeididntchoose 