Just. Say. It.

I’m not sure when I began practicing this but I make a habit of telling people I love them even if it makes them uncomfortable.promise me something tell them you love themI remember saying it to my granddaddy who never told anyone-as far as I know-that he loved them.

I spoke it over each child as soon as she or he was laid in my arms.

Growing up, I closed every telephone conversation with, “I love you” and taught my husband to do the same.

tell the people you love that hou love them

I also try hard to tell people other important things right when I think of them, instead of “later”-whenever THAT may be.

when you see something beautiful speak it

I’m so, so glad I do and I did.

I have many regrets about Dominic’s too-soon departure from this life.

But I don’t have this one:  Unspoken words of love and affirmation.

The last time he was home, it was nearing final exams and I felt like I needed him to know how very proud I was of him and how very much I admired the man he had become.  So I stopped him as he was leaving, turned his strong shoulders to face me square, and looked him in the eye to give him words of blessing.

I didn’t get to hold his hand as he left this life. 

But I’m confident as he breathed his last, he knew he was loved.



heart hands and sunset

Don’t wait to tell the people that are important to you that they ARE important to you.

Don’t save words for “next time”, “later” or “when we get together again”.

Just say it.


Right now.

greatest weakness of humans optimus prime

Author: Melanie

I am a shepherd, wife and mother of four amazing children, three that walk the earth with me and one who lives with Jesus. This is a record of my grief journey and a look into the life I didn't choose. If you are interested in joining a community of bereaved parents leaning on the promises of God in Christ, please like the public Facebook page, "Heartache and Hope: Life After Losing a Child" and join the conversation.

10 thoughts on “Just. Say. It.”

  1. I‘m so glad to read that in your family this something that people feel they want and CAN do. What a relief to know that your last words to your boy were those!

    In my family this is something that is only very slowly possible to do. I did however exchange those precious words with my father, for the first and only time ever, just days before he died. Thank God.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I love this so much…❤️
    I am so thankful that God knit this simple act so deeply in my heart – I know that my son, John Paul, knew how much he was loved… the expression of our love to one another is a family thing here, too. I do remember when the ‘heart impression’ came for me- the gentle comforting of the Holy Spirit after the sudden departure of my paternal Grandfather – just a few hours after leaving our home from a weekend visit. I was two weeks shy of turning 17 and was running late for school and opted to run for the bus rather than ‘disturb’ my Grandparents to say ‘Goodbyes’ while they were still in the guest room readying themselves for breakfast and departure. Mom urged me to go ahead and knock – (she knew they were up and about) – but I was flustered and resisted her promptings – embarrassed to disturb them and a little fearful of missing the school bus in our rural area. I was feeling quite guilty and knew she was disappointed that I had pushed to go to my boyfriend’s home the day before to celebrate his Mom’s birthday, March 31 rather than stay and visit all day – helping to prepare and share the Sunday meal with my family and grandparents. And So That Day, April 1, 1974 – My Grandfather collapsed from a heart attack as he entered his home after their trip several hours later. I was already back home from classes when the call came in from my Grandmother – I was the one who took the call and then located my parents while they worked. The thoughts and emotions that flooded my soul were powerful and life changing – from that day – my heart endeavors to live and love with no regrets 😌❤️ … and to be mindful of the soft and gentle prompting of the Holy Spirit 🕊 I decided I did not ever want anyone to ever leave my presence without me telling them how I loved them… I love you ❤️


  3. Melanie,
    I read your post everyday, this is also a regret I do not have. Shauna and the rest of my family know they are loved so much. Xo

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I am so glad! Very few things make this burden easier to bear but knowing that is one. The other is knowing that God Loves us even more than we love our children and His promises are absolutely certain. ❤️


  4. I use postcards to do this very thing….we seem to have long since got out of the habit of sending letters. There’s nothing better than receiving affirmation.
    From across the pond.. I love you Melanie x

    Liked by 1 person

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