Our family has never been the “go somewhere for the holidays” sort. We tend to stick close to home, to what’s familiar, to routine and regular bedtimes.
But lately life has thrown us a number of curveballs. And we are learning to swing at them instead of just letting them lob past us.
So just after Christmas, the four of us that were together in Alabama took a drive down to Florida to spend time with our oldest son and his wife in their new home.
We spent New Year’s Eve on a windy dog beach enjoying waves and walks and friendly strangers whose mutts came over to sniff ours.
Seafood and people watching at a nearby restaurant sitting outside in the breezy cool topped off a lovely day.
I’m learning to live with Dominic’s absence.
I’m (almost) used to photographs of my three surviving children documenting adventures that don’t include his smiling face and raucous antics. I’m trying to recapture the joy of his life and not dwell as much on the fact and circumstances of his death.
I can look forward a little further on a calendar. I can plan a bit more. My heart finds some satisfaction again in hosting friends and family for special occasions or no occasion at all.
In a word, I’m “better”.
Not healed-never healed (past tense)-until heaven.
But oh, so thankful for the days I have to spend with the family I have left.
I don’t know if Dominic can see us from where he is, but if he can’t, we’ll have lots to tell him when we get there.
One day closer.
I made some balls from little scrappy bits of fabric wrapped and glued in place. The pieces are useless alone-not big enough to do a thing. But together they are beautiful and strong and have purpose. 
thelifeididntchoose 