There is SO much meat in today’s devotion/reflection/challenge.
Once Jesus had wrestled His own will to the ground, submitted fully to the Father’s will and accepted that He would have to drink the bitter cup, and firmly faced cross-ward, He was safe from intimidation.
As Chole points out “Fear is intimidation’s oxygen”.
Read the rest here: Lenten Reflections: Fasting Fear, Believing Jesus
My friend and fellow bereaved mom, Margaret Franklin, Ryan’s mom, shared a beautiful Dutch word with me “Sterkte” (pronounced STAIRK-tah).
It literally translates “strength” or “power” but culturally means much more. It means bravery, strength, fortitude and endurance in the face of fear and insumountable odds through the empowering strength of God in me.
Not MY strength, but HIS.
Read the rest here: Trust After Loss: Appropriate God’s Strength
I have loved Scripture as long as I can remember. When I was in second grade I got the notion to read the whole Bible straight through-in the King James Version. I made it to Leviticus before I threw in the towel.
By the time my kids were grown I had read and studied Scripture for decades.
But three years before Dominic ran ahead to Heaven I realized my reading had become rote-I felt like I “knew” all the stories. So I slowed my study to a crawl-only one chapter a day-and I usually copied the whole chapter plus my notes into a journal. I had just finished this time through the Bible in January before Dom was killed in April.
And all that truth stored in my mind and heart was what I “read” for months when my eyes were too full of tears to see print on a page.
Many verses stung-some still do-but I was committed to bathe my broken heart in what I knew was true. I would take it like medicine, even when it tasted awful. I knew-in the end-it was my only hope for help.
It’s easy when doubt creeps in to let my heart hold onto it-even in the face of Truth that puts the doubt to rest.
But if all I do is question, question, question and never still my soul to receive God’s answers or His comfort, then I will simply run out of oxygen and faith.
Read the rest here: Trust After Loss: Access the Truth
Grief forces me to walk Relentlessly Forward even when I long to go back.
I can’t stop the clock or the sun or the days rolling by.
Those of us who are more than a couple months along in this journey (or any journey that involves tragedy and loss) know that it is ABSOLUTELY POSSIBLE to feel worse than in the first few days.
Because as the edges of the fog lift and the reality of an entire lifetime looms before you the questions form and the doubt sinks in:
Where ARE You God?
Why don’t You DO something?
Are You even LISTENING?
So many of us who have been in church for a long time think that Wrestling With God or entertaining doubt is sin-or, at best- unhealthy and proof of a weak faith.
Read the rest here: Trust After Loss: Acknowledge Doubt and Ask Questions
Some of us enter trembling through the door of a new year.
This last year wasn’t so good and our hearts are broken.
What if the next year is worse? How will we manage? Where can we hide from bad news, bad outcomes, disastrous trauma?
Truth is, we can’t.
So here we are, bravely marching in, hanging on to hope and begging God for mercy.
Read the rest here: New Year’s Prayer for Hurting Hearts
I’m not privy to everything God is doing in the world. And, frankly, what I see sometimes looks like He’s not doing much. I want Him to step in and make things right according to my limited knowledge.
But He’s working behind the scenes in ways I can’t imagine or comprehend.
He has a purpose and plan that will not be thwarted.
I do not for one moment believe that God Took My Child. But I absolutely, positively believe that He is using what the enemy meant for evil to accomplish good.
Read the rest here: Advent: Behind The Scenes
Many years ago my grandparents had a lovely Fiftieth Anniversary Celebration with family and friends.
My dad videotaped it and the tape was full of fun moments where my grandmother was smiling, laughing and having a wonderful day.
It was a short time afterward that she began to show signs of dementia and not very long after that she left us.
We watched the videotape a year or two after her leaving and I thought, “What a mercy she didn’t know what was coming!”
Those moments were full of unadulterated joy because a sorrowful future was hidden from her heart.
Read the rest here: I Don’t Want to Know The Future
When the deputy rang my doorbell and my heart was shattered, I didn’t receive mysterious whispered comfort nor was I cloaked in a miraculous sense of peace.
I was, instead, immediately filled to overflowing with words of life, hope, and love bubbling from the spring I’d been tending to in my soul for decades.
Nothing new but everything eternally true.
The faithful, unchangeable and never-failing character of my Shepherd King is how I carry on.
❤ Melanie
I am not a fan of church signs.
Most of the time they try to be cute and reduce eternal truth to a few words that often leave room for [mis]interpretaion.
But I saw one today that I DID like: “Dig the well before you are thirsty”.
It takes time to dig a well.
And it’s hard work.
You can’t wake up one morning, decide to dig and expect results in a couple of hours. If you want a reliable source of water to quench your thirst you have to plan ahead.
Read the rest here: Dig the Well BEFORE You are Thirsty
I have no idea why God’s plan includes me outliving my child but He has a purpose that is yet unfulfilled for my life.
What happens TO us doesn’t determine our worth-not even the awful and heart shattering experience of child loss.
You are loved by a Heavenly Father Who has a plan for your life.
He can bring beauty from ashes, even the ashes of child loss.
You are not alone-you have a community of bereaved parents who will listen, love and lift you.
Read the rest here: You are a Treasure
When I read the Psalms I hear human voices.
I hear real people living real lives facing real problems.
Life and death and celebration and devastation-all laid bare for the ages.
They give me courage to speak plainly to God.
They help me frame my own struggles in the context of who God is and not only what I feel.
I love You, Eternal One, source of my power.
2 The Eternal is my rock, my fortress, and my salvation;
He is my True God, the stronghold in which I hide,
my strong shield, the horn that calls forth help, and my tall-walled tower.
3 I call out to the Eternal, who is worthy to be praised—
that’s how I will be rescued from my enemies.
4 The bonds of death encircled me;
the currents of destruction tugged at me;
5 The sorrows of the grave wrap around me;
the traps of death lay in wait for me.Psalm 18:1-5 VOICE
David had escaped Saul’s attempt on his life. He could have given credit to his superior battle skills or ability to hide or just plain luck.
But he didn’t. He understood that God alone determined the outcome.
David knew that God was his true stronghold-not the cave or the tower where he might hide.
He is reminding his heart of truth-something I had to do the day Dominic left us.
I have never felt so desolate as the early morning when I was told my son was dead. My physical life wasn’t threatened but the life I knew was shattered.
The “bonds of death” circled my heart and I could feel them squeezing tighter and tighter.
Sorrow swallowed me whole.
There was nowhere to hide from the awful truth that death was on my doorstep.
In the hours between the knock on the door and sunrise I kept assuring myself that God was still God. I kept repeating that He had not abandoned us.
And then (because I didn’t know what else to do as I waited for family to gather) I went out to feed the animals.
Walking toward the rising sun I choked out the words to a favorite song:
The sun comes up
It’s a new day dawning
It’s time to sing Your song again
Whatever may pass
And whatever lies before me
Let me be singing
When the evening comesBless the Lord oh my soul
Oh my soul
Worship His Holy name
Sing like never before
Oh my soul
I’ll worship Your Holy nameBless The Lord, Oh My Soul by Matt Redman
There was no moment of divine revelation.
I didn’t feel the burden lift.
But I knew if I didn’t remind my heart of truth, I’d be headed toward a darker path than the one I was already walking.
“I call out to the Eternal who is worthy to be praised-that’s how I will be rescued from my enemies.”
QUESTIONS:
PRAYER:
Lord,
You are most certainly worthy of praise simply because You are God. Sometimes I struggle to praise you because You do not always give victory in the here and now and that’s hard to take. You don’t always step in and assure physical safety and that hurts my heart.
But you always invite me to bring that pain to You. You are a stronghold for my heart.
When the enemy of my soul whispers lies in my ear and tries to convince me You don’t care, help my heart refuse to be led astray. When despair tries to drag me down, speak courage to my soul and lift me up.
You have made every provision for our ultimate victory. Death doesn’t get the last word. Life does! Thank You for that promise.
Amen
